In a dramatic turn of events that could have been ripped from the pages of a sci-fi novel, billionaire entrepreneur Elon Musk has reportedly located a group of 700 missing federal employees who had retreated underground to retire in a limestone mine, sources have confirmed.
Armed with his latest underground radar technology and a keen sense of curiosity, Musk embarked on what he described as a “real-life treasure hunt.”
The discovery occurred after Musk’s newest venture, SubTerraScan, detected unusual human activity beneath the surface near a government-owned limestone mine. “We were testing for new types of rock but found some retired bureaucrats instead,” Musk tweeted with a wink emoji.
Upon entering the mine, Musk found the federal retirees, who had turned the underground location into a secret sanctuary to escape the relentless pace and pressure of Washington D.C. politics. “We just wanted a quiet place away from all the emails and memos,” one of the retirees explained, surrounded by makeshift living quarters.
As of press time, Musk was seen promoting the mine on Twitter as the ultimate retirement plan for overworked government officials, complete with sustainable living solutions and, ironically, no cell service.
