In a bizarre twist of international politics, Doug Ford, mistakenly referred to as the Prime Minister of Canada by many confused Americans, was metaphorically sent to the principal’s office after slapping a 25% tariff on U.S. goods, sources have confirmed.
The tariff, apparently a bold move to assert Canadian economic independence, ended up sparking outrage south of the border, where U.S. officials scrambled to recalibrate their GPS for Ottawa to give Ford a stern talking-to.
Despite Ford actually being the Premier of Ontario, not the Prime Minister, his audacious tariff has prompted a swift and severe ‘timeout’ by U.S. trade representatives. “We thought he was just playing Monopoly, but it turns out he was playing Risk,” joked one U.S. diplomat, trying to lighten the mood in what could be the beginning of a frosty trade war.
Ford, known for his straight-talking style, reportedly defended his actions by claiming, “I was just trying to make sure everyone remembers Canada can play hardball too.”
As of press time, Ford was seen trading in his usual business suit for a hockey jersey, stating, “If I’m going to the penalty box, I might as well dress for it.”
