A four-year NASA study that cost over three billion dollars has concluded that outer space is like, really, really dark, sources have confirmed.
“We had always suspected as much,” said NASA administrator Bill Nelson. “But there’s really no substituting cold, hard data. And in this case, we sent a bunch of our best and brightest up there to record their experience, and I’ll be damned if our hypotheses weren’t confirmed. It’s dark as hell up there! We’d like to thank all of our brave cosmonauts for sacrificing two years of their lives for this successful mission.”
Though the astronauts were welcomed as heroes upon arriving back home, many locals were unsure of the study’s necessity.
“I’m not anti-science or anything,” said Houston resident Wayne Rogers. “But how important is it that we keep learning fairly obvious or irrelevant stuff about space? We went to the moon 50 years ago, man. It feels like we should be doing Star Trek stuff by now, but every time I hear about outer space it’s for some of the dumbest research I’ve ever heard about.”
As of press time, NASA had announced a costly expedition they were launching next that would see if it was also really cold up there or what.
Well, I’m glad that has been cleared up.
One of the space missions should strive to learn whether baker’s yeast will grow in space. If it can, then the cost of bread will be reduce to a price Americans can afford.
More government wasting working peoples hard earned money for things we all rady knew. Idiots are running everything now.
What a waste of money that people had to work so hard for. just like giving billions of dollars to other Countries that are fighting stupid wars. What business does the USA have in other Countries’ stupid killings?!!
Wow, it’s dark ?
And might be cold too ?
When I get out of bed to go to the bathroom it’s cold and dark. I think it’s good that NASA has been checking to see if it’s cold and dark in Outer Space too. I mean, if it is, why should I leave my home to go live up there ? What’s the difference ? What’s the use ?
And the Northern Lights are created by all the rainbow people in Alaska shining those super flashlights at each other
In space, you can’t hear a scream because you want live long enough to register it as you can’t breathe, what about that need for a space suit and helmet with gloves, oxygen pack with a tether or rocket pack/ how that might mean it’s cold and your at the mercy of gravitational pull to whatever has a bit of mass/ we have known this since the 1st person orbited the Earth, now they can now say it’s dark/ imagine that obtained through careful study and application of the theory/ next they may treat us with an explanation for why the universe is so infinite
Captain Obvious to Captain Oblivious “It’s dark there”
Oh wait…
Maybe they should be checking to see if it’s dry in outer space too…
If there’s anything I hate more than having to get out of bed to go to the bathroom when it’s cold and dark, it’s having to take off my C-PAP when it’s dry too !
You should Think, during at least one of the multitudes of Manned Space Events, NASA Brainiacs would have considered simply taking a Calibrated Thermometer OUTSIDE the Craft during one of their “Space Walks”. Look at ALL the Money WE TAXPAYERS could have SAVED…! Just Saying…!
Anyone who bewlieves a word that comes out of NASA…needs to have their Head examined !
Anyone who believes a word……
(fat fingers)