Following an unsuccessful assassination attempt several weeks ago, Donald J. Trump has debuted the new robotic exoskeleton he will wear for all future speeches, sources confirmed earlier today.
“This is the best armor money can buy, the absolute best,” said Trump, speaking before a crowd in Grand Rapids, Michigan. “Dressing from head to toe in bulletproof alloys may seem extreme to some people, but need I remind you: I was literally shot in the head a few speeches ago. I did everything right and they shot me!”
Trump supporters seemed largely sympathetic to his new wardrobe of preference.
“Nope, I don’t blame him one bit,” said local Trump voter Randall Weatherspoon. “Not only is it smart and safe, but he looks cooler than ever up there. And the part where he let us all open fire on him to prove how effective the suit is? What a hoot! I’ve never had more fun at one of these in my life.”
As of press time, Trump’s speech was abruptly cut short after it started to lightly rain.
The suit is one thing. But what about some nut just going after supporters to make a point? That could take place. And we know how corrupt the different depts. Are.
What ever it takes
Teddy Roosevelt incarnate
This must be the Babylon Bee. Or the suit was designed by whoever is controlling Kamala. Since there is NO helmet suit would haven useless during last Deep State assassination attempt. Suit would only slow him down, making head shot easier.
love love this ..
go Trump 2024
I think the shooter attempted a head shot. Does Defendant Trump need a suit of armor or a helmet? If I were him I’d gladly leave well enough alone, be thankful the kid missed and go play golf for the rest of my days but Defendant Trump is to stupid to do that.
Oh President Trump is too stupid? Yeah ok dumbazz. You see all that he has accomplished and you call him stupid lol. You dumb demoCrapRats or whatever you are have tunnel vision and your the one that’s straight up STUPID. Quit hating on one of our best presidents ever. Lil bitch made punk.
I love your spoofs! I don’t know who your artists are but they are amazing!
me too .awesome …
God save America
All of this is idiotic. You don’t make fun of anyone being shot. This country is devoid of any morals, decency, or common sense.
Facts
What about the HEAD
THE DEMOCRATS ARE WILLING TO DO ANYTHING TO STAY IN POWER. EVEN KILL.
CLINTON CHEATED A MILLION TIMES TO HILLARY WHILE IN OFFICE THEY DID NOT TRY TO PUT HIM IN JAIL. THEY STOLE MONEY ETC. BIDEN TAKES SHOWER WITH DAUGHTER, HE IS NOT A MOLESTER, HAS STOLEN MONEY ETC HUNTER BIDEN SELLS UGLY PAINTINGS FOR LOTS OF MONEY BECAUSE HIS BIDEN NAME.
I DO NOT THINK THAT HARRIS IS GOING TO BE NOMINATED FOR PRESIDENT. OBAMA TRIED BEING PRESIDENT AND LOVED IT. HE WILL NOMINATE MICHAEL ROBINSON OBAMA SO HE CAN BE 8 MORE YEARS IN WHITE HOUSE. HE HAS ALREADY HAD 8 PLUS BIDENS 4 IT IS NOT ENOUGH HE WANTS MORE. HE HAS NOT DESTROID AMERICA YET. ANTICHRIST CREEP.
THERE IS NO FREEDOM OF SPEECH THANKS TO YOU NEWS PERSONS YOU DESERVE WHAT IS COMING. ANOTHER CUBA, VENEZUELA, ETC.